The Wrath of Grapes

Posted on January 28, 2014 under Storytelling with one comment




“Wine improves with age.  The older I get, the better I like it.”


Is it just my imagination or is every single person (married people too!)­ on the planet over the age of 55 drinking wine these days?  Is it possible that the glory days of rum, scotch and tequila have been thrown into the dustbin of our collective history, relegated to memories … many of them bad?  Is wine a passing fad of the boomers or a fundamental shift in drinking patterns?

It seems that many of us started our illustrious drinking careers consuming cheap wine, and now we’ve reached the other end of the continuum and we’re drinking expensive stuff.

Show of hands.  How many of you have put a jug of Golden Glow up to your lips?  Ruby Rouge?   Hermit? Bright’s 74?  Mateus?  You probably imbibed some of this nectar of the gods when you were young.  And lived to tell about it.

.And, speaking of Hermit, connoisseurs know that Hermit’s Dark was a for fighting at dances and Hermit’s White was dancing wine

Now it’s merlot and shiraz and zinfandel (zin).  More and more people not only drink wine before, during and after meals, but they have become students.  Many tourists now include a tour of wineries when they travel abroad.  I have done tours of scotch facilities in Scotland and rum factories in Barbados.  They usually have hazard signs when entering these facilities.  And I don’t think they’re worried about you coming into contact with dangerous equipment.

And speaking of zin.   Last year when we were in Florida, I received a text from a friend who was just arriving at the airport in Tampa.  “Please pick up a couple of bottles of white zinc.”  I almost went to an art store thinking that she was going to do some painting.  When I replied, “What do you want white zinc for?” she immediately corrected me and asked me to remove the c from zinc.

We have always had good excuses to drink.  We become smarter, wittier and sexier.  Fat chance.  How about better dancers?  The only time I went to a square dance, I nearly knee capped my partner after an overabundance of Captain Morgan.

And why are so many people consuming wine in record amounts?  Because it’s part of a healthy diet.   A six ounce glass of red wine is supposed to be good for our hearts.

When was the last time that you saw a Maritimer measure a drink?  What utter nonsense.   Around here, you pour your booze “by feel”.  You either eyeball it or give it the two or three finger test.  Doctors suggest that we stop after consuming a measly six ounces of wine per day.  Sage advice, but hardly worth opening the bottle.  Is it o.k. to toss down a week’s worth all at once?

My wife is a big fan of a local wine, Nova 7.  So is my mother.  Twice as expensive as most sparkling wines, it has half the alcohol content.  Hmmmm.  Keeping my wife and my mother happy … priceless.

Maybe wine appreciation is a fad, or maybe it is a trend that is here to stay.  The baby boomers have long defined what is “hip”.  Be careful, because being hip now has a very different meaning.  You’re more apt to be replacing one than being one.

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