Posted on May 7, 2018 under Monday Morning Musings with 2 comments

 

“Let me tell you ‘bout the birds and the bees, and the flowers and the trees,

And the moon up above, and a thing called love.”

The Birds and The Bees (As sung by Jewel Akens)

“Hi. I’m Linda and I’m sorting dildos.”

I have had some unique introductions in my days but none quite like this one. My recent travels took me to Burlington, Ontario for a few days to visit some friends from university. We had lots of great chats, shared food, and had some walks.

At some point in our lives, we’ve all helped a friend or family member move. While moving can be onerous and stressful, getting together with friends to pack boxes can actually be a lot of fun, especially if you’re not the one on the move. Loading furniture into the back of a moving van is the easy part. But dealing with all the smaller items you have accumulated over the years is the nightmarish part.

So when I was asked by one of my friends to go to a sex toy shop to help the owner pack up her business, what was I to say? (There are so many things that I could have said but I have carefully cultivated many loyal readers over the years so I’ll stifle the urge to be too graphic.)

I have helped business owners do inventory before. Anybody can count chocolate bars, nails and screws, or widgets. We also know what these items are and how they function. But I admit with some sheepishness that there were many (most) objects in the sex toy shop that left me baffled. Oh, who am I kidding; all of the objects left me baffled. Of course, getting the job done quickly and efficiently was the objective so stopping to read labels didn’t seem appropriate although my curiosity often got the best of me. I would be staring at an object with utter disbelief wondering what it was what its function could possibly be.

There were three other people sorting and packing, all women. The owner obviously knew the products she was selling and I was glad that I wasn’t the only one who giggled and guffawed throughout the morning . ( and had a puzzled expression.)  I was interested to learn that the customer base didn’t fit into any identifiable demographic. Even though the store was technically closed, there were still lots of customers coming in to check out marked down items, looking for a last minute deal.

I can’t remember the last time that I laughed so many times in the space of three hours. I even tried on a few items of clothing. If I get 200 likes and 50 shares, I might show you one sample. No. On second thought, that is a really bad idea. My “Volunteer of the Year” award might be revoked immediately and the locks on our apartment door changed upon my return.

I know what you’re wondering. What was the most interesting thing I encountered in the store?

Actually, it wasn’t a “thing” at all. It was a person and possibly one of the most inspiring people I have ever met. Linda (in the dildo sorting department!), is an amazing woman. Three days after her wedding, her husband was in an accident and instantly became a quadriplegic. Their story is remarkable enough but the other adversities she has faced in her life left me nearly speechless, and you know how hard this is! I am hoping to do a Faces in the Crowd story about this truly remarkable person. I have already offered to do a book on her life and I hope she takes me up on the offer.

Well, there you go. I told you about my three hours in a sex toy shop without having to bare my soul or any other body part…mercifully.

In the space of a week, I’ve been to a medical marijuana dispensary and a sex toy shop. What can possibly be next?

Have a great week.

 

Posted on May 3, 2018 under Thursday Tidbits with no comments yet

Mt.Rainier. Washington State

 

You may have noticed. I have traveled quite a bit in my lifetime, especially since I retired three years ago. I have traveled by car, train, bus, airplane, boat, motorcycle, and rickshaw. And of course on foot. If you have time and patience, traveling can be a great education.

Yes, with the internet, you can go to the four corners of the earth in the safety of your own home. But even in these times of instant information and on line reviews, there is nothing quite like traveling in real time. Agreed, there will be glitches. Weather can affect your plans and there are many other unavoidable delays. If you are catching a connecting flight and you know that you’re going to miss it, it can be very upsetting. Ditto for lost luggage. If you’re traveling with an elderly passenger or small children, you can sometimes be faced with issues that put your patience quota to the test.

But it is so worth it when you can reconnect with old friends and family members, or have a chance to see the wonders of other parts of the world.

Many people hate airports. I am not one of them. People watching is one of my favourite things to do while I’m waiting to board a flight. Sitting in Heathrow, O’Hare, and the airport in New Delhi, you can watch the world walk past you. Who are these people? What is their story? Where are they heading? Will their journey bring them joy or sorrow? What do they do for a living? If I’m not fatigued, I’ll often engage with someone sitting in the waiting area, or on a plane or train. Young or old, everyone has a story to tell. And of course, there are times when you want to be left alone with your thoughts.

Every person working in an airport wears some kind of uniform. They are all part of a vast and complicated organizational structure that keeps things operational.

I love watching planes take off and land, marveling at the mechanics involved in getting them off the ground with hundreds of passengers and tons of luggage. I am even more in awe wondering how they can stay airborne so long. My longest non- stop flight was fifteen hours from Delhi to Toronto.

With more and more of us traveling, ticket prices remain affordable. I remember flying out to Victoria in the early 70’s. In today’s dollars, factoring in inflation, flying is cheaper now then it was 45 years ago. Mind you, the days of free meals and free booze are gone unless you’re sharing space with the elite. I’m in the cattle class and only get a whiff of luxury when forced to pass through the first class section of the plane.

What are the longest ten minutes of a trip taken by plane?  That’s easy. The plane taxis to the arrival gate. The engines are turned off. Almost instantaneously, the cabin gets very warm. People are tired, stiff and often cranky as they wait for the door of the plane to open. The anticipation of getting off the plane and meeting loved ones is palpable. It reminds me of the moments prior to starting a marathon. You can almost cut the air with a knife. When the door finally opens (it feels like hours but it is usually only minutes), everyone starts to move, even if you’re near the rear of the plane. People in window seats feel the need to get up even though their turn could be several minutes. Bodies are contorted in strange angles as people try to stand even there’s not enough room. Invariably the person in the row behind you is chomping to get off the plane and elbows you as you try and get your carry on from the overhead bin.

And then, freedom.

I saw this passage in the Air Canada En Route magazine the other day while flying from Victoria to Toronto. It pretty well sums up my feelings about travel.

“Profound, if brief, encounters with strangers are among travel’s chief pleasures, an opportunity to look at the world from someone else’s perspective. At a time when some wish to build walls between “us and them,” our ability to forge connections is more necessary than ever.”

Amen.

Have a great weekend.

 

Posted on April 30, 2018 under Monday Morning Musings with 4 comments

Cedar Hills Golf Course. Victoria, B.C.

 

Coming to Victoria is like coming home. I lived here for a time back in the early 70’s. As I have stated many times, it is my favourite city in Canada and this time, Victoria welcomed me with open arms as it would appear that I brought some good weather with me from Arizona. The day I arrived, was the best day of another wise, wet, and cool spring. The temperature soared into the mid 20’s and we had three consecutive days of warm, sunny weather. Allergy sufferers might have been none too pleased as every manner of plant, tree and flower was blooming.

On Saturday, the rain and cooler temperatures returned but this didn’t deter brother Tom, me, and his golden retriever, Oslo from doing a 10K walk to the Oak Bay marina for coffee and scones.

This is a fantastic walking city with dozens and dozens (if not hundreds) of walking trails. I’m generally not a “step” counter but my IPhone tells me that I’m averaging over 20,000 steps a day.

The picture above is the Cedar Hill Golf Club, a course I played many times way back when. There is an undulating walking trail around the perimeter of the course, a wonderful place to go in the evening. The Olympic mountain range in Washington State is in the background.

It is easy to see why Victoria is the retirement capital of Canada.

My quest for pain management continues. Some of you asked for an update.

I know many of you have chronic pain issues so my situation is far from unique. It’s quite normal for most people our age. The hot, dry weather in Phoenix, Arizona helped for sure but I don’t think I was there long enough to say for sure if this is the answer. I have been experimenting with all kinds of medical marijuana products. Yesterday was a first for me. I went to a perfectly legal medical marijuana dispensary. It was a bright, modern store with chilled lemon ice water and flat screen TV’s. The staff were well dressed and very professional looking. They have a registered nurse on staff for free consultations.

I have been reading a lot about CBD oil. After a lengthy conversation, I bought a small number of pills. So far, they don’t seem to have any recognizable benefit. A friend, who lives here, gave me some topical marijuana cream. It seems to give a bit of relief but it doesn’t last long.

At this point, I don’t really think there’s a panacea, which is what I expected in the first place. The last major frontier is diet. I have been reading the book: “Eating Clean. The 21 day Plan to Detox, Fight Inflammation and Reset Your Body.” I have friends who swear that eating clean will likely result in a reduction of inflammation, but this will take some work and discipline. I always enjoy suggestions that you send along. Is turmeric the answer? Stay tuned.

I’m not quite sure how to address this next topic. I’m flying to Toronto on Tuesday and will spend 3 days in Hamilton with some old friends. One of them sent me this message yesterday (paraphrased): “Would you volunteer to help a friend of mine pack up her shop? She’s closing down her business.” My friend is aware of my physical limitations (no heavy lifting). I immediately agreed. My friend went on to say: “It will be a unique experience as my friend owns an adult sex toy store.” I have been trying to wipe the grin off of my face ever since. I haven’t even gotten there and I think I could already write the story that you KNOW I’m going to write when the task is completed. I am going to have to choose my words very carefully so as not to offend any of you. I don’t very often get handed a gift story like this.

Have a great week.

P.S. No. I won’t bring back any discounted items from the store for you!